On Sunday night, I landed in the bed of a semi-goddess born in 1993. I’m ten years older and it was my first time as a cougar. It weirded me out at the beginning, especially because she was highlighting it all the time with stuff like “You are beautiful for your age” or “What can you teach me about life?”

I eventually looked at the funny side of things and it really cracked me up.

In the middle of the night, we were chilling out in bed and her flat mate/ex-boyfriend got back home and walked in the room.

There I was, like a much cheaper version of Brigitte Bardot in ‘Le Mépris’, lying in the nude with my cheveux blonds épars in the flat of two strangers who were teenagers yesterday.

She told him: “That’s [my first name]. She applied for a job at the United Nations.”

He looked at me for a second and finally said: “Wow. That’s bad ass.”

That’s the most glamorous introduction that was ever made of me.